The New year is easily a period everyone is nudged to set new goals. The prompts are everywhere – media, blog posts, churches, schools and especially social media.
It is almost like a taboo to start the year without the cliche new year resolutions or new year, new me mantra. It is however sad that a number of us do not live up to these self imposed mantra for a one month. Sometimes, we do not even get to a week before faltering.
The reason this happens will always be, joining the band wagon without carefully thinking it through. Like a number of us make it seem, I refuse to believe that we failed to get anything right in the past year and just want to throw away the whole book and grab a new one to write in.
For me, it will always be about re-evaluating processes and finding things to quit and add along the way. I preach making new decisions everyday or when required but never only in the new year.
While there are a number of resources online to help you make goals and resolutions, this post is basically to point you to the things you should quit this year.
The aim is to help you stay clutter free and have a clear head to actually pursue meaningful living as well as making it a lifestyle.
Things You Should Quit This Year.
1. Quit Making Snappy Judgement.
For some reason, this seems to be one thing a lot of us struggle with. We make snappy conclusions about people and situations.
We make conclusions off pictures, social media posts, other people’s opinion of a person, dressing, way of life etc
While it is almost impossible to not make conclusions off first impressions, it is wrong to dwell on those impressions without going a step further to know the true state of things. Following your intuition does not mean being blind to finding out the real thing.
If you really want to know about a persons business idea or way of life, ask when you have the opportunity. Don’t lurk or pry.
People have lost business opportunities because they made a snappy conclusion about what the employer wants. People have lost the opportunity to be good friends with a person because they believed a third party opinion or just made a snappy judgement from afar.
This year, quit making snappy judgements, be open minded, avoid negative assumptions and learn to find out things for yourself. Do not miss opportunities and blame your instincts later.
2. Quit Making Excuses For People.
In a bid to live a meaningful life, we may want to always see the good in everything and in everyone.
You are told to remain positive, look forward to the light at the end of the tunnel, impact lives and be the light that brightens up a room. Great, and yes that is how you should live.
However, I will explain how you should not live using a very popular proverb in Nigeria that reads (paraphrased) – ‘Lean on me does not mean push me into the wall’.
For a meaningful life, you need people and relationships to function, no man is an island and so, team work is encouraged.
In all of this, you must also be able to decipher what relationships to nurture and what relationships to quit. When people show you their true color with proof that their ideas will never align with your purpose, talk a walk.
This year, quit making excuses for people or forcing friendships that will drain you or make you dim your light for others to shine.
3. Stop Existing, Start Living.
In one of my Economics lectures in the university, I was introduced to the term cash cow and since then, I have likened ‘cash cow’ to a number of things.
A cash cow is a money maker, money spinner or a project that generates continuous flow of money.
Relating to daily living, it reminds me of the person who lives for others, who does things for other people, always the host where parasites thrive, the giver, the nurturer, the adviser but never the person receiving.
Again, there is nothing wrong with being the bedrock or foundation on which other houses are built, but if you are not strong enough and have no plan for yourself, everyone will end on the floor. You simply can pour from an empty cup. Intentionally find time to do things for YOU.
Life has taught us that you will always be recognized when you are a philanthropist and easily accessible, but not everyone will stand by you when the chips are down. What then happens to you if you had no plan or investment for yourself?
This is where I implore you to quit existing and start living, especially for yourself. Recharge your mind body and soul so that you can keep serving others.
Invest in personal growth, do things for yourself, reward yourself, make self-care a priority, say ‘no’ sometimes and give yourself permission to take breaks.
4. Quit Being In A Hurry.
To achieve a particular goal, there are series of actions or steps that needs to be taken.
To attain a certain level, one must go through the required process and every step is important as it confirms you are capable to handle the next level.
All I am driving at is, quit being in a hurry to meet or surpass the next person. Patiently go through the required process you need to achieve your goal. Do this without jealousy or comparison.
Learn at your pace, make your mistakes and persevere. Sometimes, tell yourself the truth and take a step back while still learning.
There is nothing more embarrassing than not being able to carry out a task when you finally get the job or gig you have been clamoring for. If you really are not up to par, say it and keep learning.
This year, quit being in a hurry. Do not allow the fear of missing out make you wear the cap of a king when you are not mentally ready to serve.
5. Quit ‘Winging’ Your Time.
What you do with your time is very important and your time cannot be managed properly without a plan.
That being said, it is only proper to have a realistic plan you can work with everyday.
Do not wake up each day with the intention to just go with the wind or flow with the rhythm. What then happens when there is a time bound decision to make?
Find ways to stop spending time on things that yield no return. From friendships down to social media, if it is not giving you value worth your time, you need to stop.
Re-evaluate your daily routine, leisure time, time spent on social media etc . Do not ignore your distractions, instead intentionally allot time to do those things that can distract you from doing the things on your real to-do list.
Leave the past behind and stop wallowing in self-pity. Cry and take out your emotions the best way you can but please give yourself a chance at re-discovery.
Share your thoughts.
What things will you quit this year?
I will love to read from you.